Sense of Self

When you cultivate a strong sense of self, an inner knowing, a felt experience of who you are, you won’t need to rely on any external circumstances or labels to help define you. You won’t cling onto your job because you associate your identity with your job title. You won’t dread ending a relationship that no longer works out because you don’t know who you’d be without your/a partner. You won’t need to wear a certain type of clothes to show everyone as well as to self-validate that you’re a serious or a successful person. You won’t need to shop or dine in certain places, follow a certain diet, exercise routine or social trend and you won’t even feel the need to condemn this or that just because your opposition of XYZ forms your identity and thus gives you the impression that you know who you are in this world.

A real, felt sense of self comes from the inside. When you feel yourself, you don’t have to rely on external labels, possessions or appearances to help you get a glimpse of you. When you cultivate a felt sense of self, it will be unaffected by changes in your external world. You stop giving a crap about what people think and say. Because you know who you are. You don’t need their judgements of you to inform you who YOU are. You find peace. You find freedom. You find joy.

I am finding that feeling oneself and knowing oneself leads to ultimate self-confidence and that is the number one indicator and catalyst for success and satisfaction.

(Granted, competence is important, but if you have competence but don’t believe in yourself, you’re not gonna succeed — or if you do, you will likely self-sabotage and lose all your wins very quickly, because you don’t believe you actually deserve success. I could tell you all about it. 🤣🙈 But that’s a topic for another day. :))